How to reduce your Fears! 5 Tips!

FearHave you ever found yourself in a situation and realized that you must make a decision to possibly move forward or act on a certain goal, but felt yourself consumed with this overwhelming but familiar fear?

Its a fear that comes out of NOWHERE and ambushes you. It leaves you paralyzed and undecided

It leaves you not knowing whether to take a step forward into the unknown OR step back into a familiar comfort zone. All the while knowing that it is in your best interest to move forward, but your legs wont seem to move!

If you have ever felt like that then I can definitely identify with you!

I’ve felt like that with respect to lots of simple things too…
Recently its been about setting up an online business… but in the past it been as simple asking my girlfriend out on her first date, learning to drive, my 1st day at college, etc…

Well I’ve read this book, Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers and its helped a lot!

I mean don’t get me wrong though, I loooove to tell you that I’ve totally gotten rid of my ALL of fears instantly. I’d love to tell you that I’m the next Don Jaun with respect to women, OR the next Terminator in the face of adversity. But unfortunately I’m currently not…

However, it DID HELP me put a very interesting perspective and positive outlook on the way I view my fears… In Susan’s book, one of the concepts that she brings to light is that fact the there are certain, truths about fears that everyone should be aware of, in order to deal with them.

I’ll share one of my favorite excerpts from the book that I always refer back to from time to time. Why don’t you read it yourself and tell me what you think…

At the bottom of every one of your fears is simply the fear that you are unable to handle whatever life may bring you.

By virtue of us all being human we share the same feeling. Fear is no exception.

Say the Fear Truths AT LEAST 10 times a day for the next month. Why? Retraining faulty thinking takes constant repetition. Knowing the Fear Truths is NOT enough. You have to keep feeding them to yourself until they become a part of your being- until you start to reverse your behavior and move toward you desired goals, rather than retreat.

  • Truth 1
    The fear will never go away, as long as I continue to grow.

    (or continue to push into the world or stretch my capabilities or take new risks)
  • Truth 2
    The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and do it.

    (The “doing it” comes before the fear dissolves. Do not play WHEN/THEN games)
    NB: A WHEN/THEN game is like making up an excuse and saying to yourself,
    ”Oh… well WHEN the thing that causes my fear goes away, THEN I’ll proceed to do A, B and C…
  • Truth 3
    The only way to feel better about myself is to go out and do it.

    When you do something, not only does the fear go away, but you also get a BONUS: You do a lot towards building your self confidence!
  • Truth 4
    Not only am I going to experience fear whenever I’m on unfamiliar territory, but so is everyone else.

    Have you every found yourself saying:
    “You mean all those people out there that I’ve been looking up to because they were NOT afraid to move ahead with their lives have REALLY been afraid too?
    Then that means I have the rest of the world to keep me company!”
  • Truth 5
    Pushing through your fear is a lot less frightening than living with the underlying fear, that comes from a feeling of helplessness when you do not take action
    People who refuse to take risk, live with a feeling of dread that is far more severe than what they would feel if they took risks necessary to make themselves less helpless.

You see, I “know” that on some deep level there is nothing to fear. It’s the surface level that needs convincing. In the meantime I’ve learned to “feel the fear… and do it anyway!” As I do, whether I feel the fear or not becomes irrelevant.

The first time I read that it blew my mind!
I was like WOOOOOW!

So I typed and printed it out and did as she said! I repeated over the month. And I still to this day come back to this excerpt from time to time.

Feel the Fear… And Do it Any… A great book! Short… Sweet. Susan has this down to earth way of speaking to you as you read and she provide many little exercises, in the book (like the one above) to really challenge yourself.

I hope you enjoyed my first blog…
And above all I hope that that excerpt moves and helps you the way that it did for me.
Please feel free to let me know what you think!

By the way, this is my VERY first blog ever- I’m new to the entire concept and to be honest, I’m not to sure where and what exactly I’d like to get out of this blogging experience.

So for now, this may possibly sound REAL amusing to lots of people, but I’m a blogging virgin, and I think its safe to say that I trying to learn how to blog, while at the same time share some of my experiences with you to promote positive growth, learning and communication.

So please bare with me, if I do not follow the conventional blogging techniques for now. Hopefully I’d get the hang of it and be able to communicate, share or offer something useful to you guys out there more easily in the future…

So that’s it for now…

Jacek Jarvis



One Response to “How to reduce your Fears! 5 Tips!”

  1. Cathy Says:

    Awh you’re just so wise! lol
    I got a feeling im really gonna learn alot from you.
    Ima look for that book and also keep listening to that CD you sent me.
    Thanks fer all your advise.

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